It's Friday, So I'm Totally Phoning It In.

Today should be good.

I'm taking my creative team for lunch at Hooters and then joining my wifey for a bang-up birthday fiesta that might actually last all weekend long.

So, in the absence of any real effort, I'm going to pass on an email that makes fun of the Germans.

Which, if you think about it, is almost always a good time too.

"The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby
English will be the official language of the European Union rather than
German,which was the other possibility.

As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that
English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year
phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will
make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in
favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have
one less letter.

There will be growing publikenthusiasm in the sekond year when the
troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like
fotograf 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted
to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have
always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag
is disgrasful and it should go away.

By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th"
with "z" and "w" with "v".

During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vordskontaining
"ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru."

Have a great naweek. I know I'm gonna.

Epic...

Bet you can't guess the ending...

I Lol'led. Out Loud.

Ross sent me this, this morning.

"I received a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend who called 'out-of-the-blue' this morning to see if I was still around.

We lost track of time, chatting about the wild, romantic times we used to enjoy together. I couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd be interested in meeting up and rekindling a little of that "old magic".

"Wow!" I was flabbergasted.

"I don't know if I could keep pace with you now", I said, "I'm a bit older and a bit greyer and balder than when you last saw me. Plus I don't really have the energy I used to have."

She just giggled and said she was sure I would "rise to the challenge".

"Yeah." I said. "Just so long as you don't mind a waistline that's a few inches wider these days! Not to mention my total lack of muscle tone...everything is sagging, my teeth are a bit yellowed and I am developing jowls like a Great Dane!"

She laughed and told me to stop being so silly. She teased me saying that tubby, gray haired, older men were cute, and she was sure I would still be a great lover.

Then she giggled and said, "Anyway, I've put on a few pounds myself!"


So I told her to fuck off."

Best Client Comment Ever. Ever.

"Point 2 - On the pictures you've suggested – can you please remove the ‘Shutterstock’ logo’s & text?"

For serious.


That just happened.

Spring Has Sprung. So Has Springbreak, And It Sprung Up On Me Nicely.

Last Friday I did something I haven't done in a while...

Paid my taxes.

Also, I put on my square toed shoes and stripey shirt and went out. In public and everything.

Had some drinks at Luca's, this really tasty little pizza joint in Paulshof and then around the corner to a fancy-pants club called Movida.

Never been there before, it's not a bad little place to get fershnickered and wonder - if they're this short already - what ladieses skirts are going to look like in five years.

I really can't wait.

But I digress.

A fun thing happened - we were chilling out, maxin', relaxin' and cooling, shooting some shooters and hoping our mom's wouldn't get scared when a couple of dames came by...

Holy crap on a cracker, I haven't seen a party promoted like this before.

It needs to happen more often.